It’s early morning on a Saturday and the house is quiet. Everybody is still asleep and I’m sitting at the laptop releasing the demons from my head. This is good. They’ve been dying to get out for a while now and since so much has been going on in my life over the last month, I’ve had little time for the writing. I’ve missed it.
So why am I wasting time with musings about writing? I don’t know, just something else to write about, I guess. People do it all the time, write about writing, sing about singing, dream about sleeping. It’s kinda fun. Helps me clear my mind and get the fingers moving across the keyboard. Cramped keyboard though it may be.
Sometimes it just gets the thoughts flowing. For many authors, writers block can be a big obstacle to overcome. For me, it hasn’t really been an issue. Whenever I feel bogged down in the story, or have taken a little time off from writing and feel rusty, or am losing the vision, if I just start typing something, anything at all, my imagination usually kicks in after a sentence or two and the juices start flowing again.
I think it’s magic. Or the closest thing to magic I have found and that is probably why I enjoy the creation of the story over anything else that is associated with being an author. I think you will find that most authors feel the same. Sure, recognition and the warm and fuzzies I get from praise of my story is great, but it doesn’t come close to the euphoria I feel when the story took off on some tangent I didn’t see coming. A twist that even my conscious mind could not think of.
Monetary compensation for work is awesome, but so far, that has not proven fruitful in this little adventure of mine. I’m not even upset about it. I would write anyway. I did a little comparison based on my salary at my ‘Day’ job and the time and effort that is put into it every day compared to the time and effort I put into writing and the ‘salary’ or ‘profit’ I currently receive from the sales of the first book. It is laughable. I work about 207% (I’m a little weak in math in my old age) harder at the book than my ‘day’ job and bring in…uh…carry the 2…99.994% less. I would still do it. Why? Let’s go there.
Lately, I’ve had a lot of people ask why I write.
This is usually preceded by, “I think you’re a psycho!” Or, “You definitely have an imagination.” Or, “Did your parents keep you locked up as a kid?”
I just smile and indulge them. They usually walk away shaking their heads. Guess I’m not a very good salesman.
So, let’s try it: “You definitely have an imagination. Why do you write?”
I always say, “Because I have to.”
“I don’t get it,” they say. “Nobody has to do anything.”
I point out that we have to breath and eat and sleep and…you get it, and like those life sustaining functions, I have to write.
“Oh…so it’s like an urge. Like a sex thing.” Then they smile.
“Not really.” Though I would like it to be. Let’s put it like this: If I DON’T write, I go psycho. If I DON’T write, I grow stagnant. If I DON’T write, I would rather be locked up and the key thrown away. It’s just something I must do, something that consumes me, something that MAKES me.
“You’re just saying this to be cute,” they say. “You really just want to be rich and famous.”
I wouldn’t mind, no, but really, it’s just a matter of necessity (see previous math). If I didn’t make a penny, If I didn’t have a single reader, If no one would publish my musings, I would still do it. Everyday. Always. Plus…it’s fun. And it buys me a taco or two every once in a while.
But back to writer’s block, or writer’s cramps (what?), or writer’s black hole, whatever you want to call it, I’m very thankful that the magic still flows through my fingers. And yes, it is in my fingers, because I can’t seem to make it work if I’m just sitting there thinking. Some physical thing has to be going on for the thoughts to flow. Weird, huh?
A gift? Maybe. If the writing is good it’s a gift, if it is not, some would say it a curse. Still, if I had to pick a gift or a curse, I would still chose writing for both. How could I lose?
My apologies for the rambling, I’m back to it now. Have a great weekend and enjoy the day. I’m sure after the quiet of the morning is over, some new drama will rear its head in my house and I’ll have to cage the demons in my head until I’m allowed to release the magic again. Be well!